Norris Approved!
When I was a kid I saw a movie called Invasion U.S.A. with Chuck Norris, in which he shoots two Uzis in seemingly random fashion. It was so over-the-top, preying on Americans’ irrational fear of invading Soviet forces, that I am sure if I was fortunate enough to see it again today I would laugh throughout. At the time I saw it, however, I was terrified by the perilous situations depicted in the film. For instance, terrorists attach a bomb to the side of a school bus sitting in traffic. Back then I rode the school bus each day, so the scene struck a chord with me. A chord of fear. Thankfully, Chuck Norris saves the kids, and dispatches the terrorists with a witty one-liner (and their own bomb).
Fast forward over twenty years, and the Soviets no longer inspire fear in the hearts of Americans, in spite of their backsliding on democracy under Vladimir Putin. There are actual lunatic terrorists on the loose in places like Pakistan, but god forbid we make good on President Bush’s “you’re-either-with-us-or-you’re-with-the-terrorists” rhetoric and come down hard on Pervez Musharraf. I am all in favor of parachuting Chuck Norris into the mountains of Tora Bora and having him deal with Osama bin Laden in whatever manner he saw fit. I imagine it would look something like this, but possibly less swampy.
Still, that doesn’t seem to be a priority for Republican voters or political candidates. Rather, their enemy has suddenly become Mexico, as though we’ve rolled the clock back to 1846. I have a big problem with politicians exploiting people’s bigotry to win office, nevertheless, if they do it like Mick Huckabee does here, I can at least appreciate it as comedy:
I don't like going places, doing things or seeing people.
